翻译: 朽
Morty 来 Morty, you got to come on.
跟我走一趟 You got to come with me.
校对: 史努比嘟
咋回事儿 What's going on?
我给你个惊喜 I got a surprise for you, morty.
可现在是半夜啊 It's the middle of the night. What are you talking about?
有惊喜 快来 I got a surprise for you. Come on, hurry up.
后期: Nico
嗷 Ow!
- 别拉得这么用劲儿啊 - 给你个惊喜 Morty - Ow! You're tugging me too hard. - I got a surprise for you, Morty.
压制: 凯撒
你觉得 What do you... what do you
这飞船咋样啊 Morty Think of this flying vehicle, Morty?
我拿车库里的东西造的 I built it out of stuff I found in the garage.
挺好的 Rick Yeah, Rick, it's
挺棒的 It's great.
惊喜就是这个吗 Is this the surprise?
Morty 我必须必须必须 Morty, I had to I had to do I had to I had
必须得搞个炸弹 Mory To I had to make a bomb, Morty.
我造了个炸弹 I had to create a bomb.
啥 炸弹 What?! A bomb?!
炸弹投下去 创造新天地 We're gonna drop it down there just get a whole fresh start, Morty.
新呀新天地 Create a whole fresh start.
这太疯了吧 T-t-that's absolutely crazy!
来嘛Morty Come on, Morty.
淡定点Morty Just take it easy, Morty.
会很赞的 It's gonna be good.
现在咱去接你的小伙伴Jessica Right now, we're gonna go pick up your little friend jessica.
Jessica Jessica?
我数学课上那个 From my math class?
我扔炸弹下去的时候 我不想 When I drop the bomb, I don't, you know, I want you to
我想让你有人陪着 Have somebody, you know
我希望你能那啥 I want you to have the thing
就和新世界的亚当与夏娃一样 你就是亚当 I'm gonna make it like a new adam and eve, and you're gonna be adam.
Jessica就是夏娃 惊喜吧 Morty And jessica's gonna be eve, and so that's the surprise, Morty.
不行 No, you can't!
Jessica根本不认识我 J-jessica doesn't even know I exist.
先别管这个 你不能毁灭人类 But but but forget about that, because you can't blow up humanity.
我知道你想说啥 Morty I-I get what you're trying to say, M-Morty.
听着 我不 你不 你不用担心 Listen, I'm not you don't y-y-you don't got to worry about me
我不会调戏Jessica 或者玩弄Jessica 之类的 trying to fool around with with jessica or mess around with jessica or anything.
我不是那种人 Morty I'm I'm not that kind of guy, Morty.
Rick 你在说什么 What are you talking about, Rick?
你你你不用 You you you don't
担心我会 Have to worry about me getting
和Jessica搞上什么的 With jessica or anything.
她她她是你一个人的 Morty She she she she she's all for you, Morty.
Jessica不是重点 I don't care about Jessica!
Morty 没错 你说得对 You know what, Morty? You're right.
别管这妹子了 Let's forget the girl all together.
留下也是祸患 She she's probably nothing but trouble, anyways.
中微子炸弹装载中 Arming neutrino bomb.
够了 That's it that's it, Rick.
方向盘给我 I'm taking the wheel.
闪开 Morty Get off of me, Morty!
我不能让你这样 I'm taking charge of this situation, buddy.
你发啥疯 What's gotten into you?
我才不会在边上跟个傻 I'm I'm I'm i'm not gonna stand around like some sort of dumb...
你搞啥 疯了吗 What are you, crazy?
傻瓜一样让你把地球灭了 ... person and just let you blow up the whole world.
好吧好吧 All right, all right.
我降落就是了 I'll I'll land.
我降落就是了 I'll land. I'll land.
这就降落好吧 I'll land the thing.
这就降落 I'll land the thing.
突然这么男人了 Big tough guy all of a sudden.
咱就停这儿吧 We'll park it right here, Morty.
就这路边上吧 Right here on the s-side of the r-road here.
谢天谢地 Oh, thank god.
Morty 其实这是个考验 You know what? That was all a test, Morty.
精心策划 Just an elaborate test to make
让你更加坚定 You more assertive.
真的 It was?
当然了 不然咧 Sure. Why not?
我咋知道 I don't I don't know.
知道吗 Mo You you know what, Mo
中微子炸弹装载完毕 Neutrino bomb armed.
呃 Um...
瑞克与莫蒂
电波诚译
第一季 第一集
今晚要播新一期歌唱节目啦 I see there's a new episode of that singing show tonight.
你们觉得最佳歌手是谁 Who do you guys think is gonna be the best singer?
上帝啊 Oh, my god.
头都砸进饭里了 His head is in his food.
我想吐 I'm going to puke.
Morty 你病了吗 Morty, are you getting sick?
跟你说了别拿客厅里的枕头练亲亲 I told you not to practice-kiss the living-room pillow.
狗狗在上面睡觉的 The dog sleeps on it.
我没亲枕头 妈 I wasn't kissing a pillow, mom.
我就是昨晚没睡好 I just I didn't get a lot of sleep last night.
可能我的梦太吵了什么的 Maybe my dreams were just too loud or something.
其实是你整晚都和Rick外公在外面吧 Or maybe you were out all night again with grandpa Rick.
啥 What?!
爸 Dad?
咋 每天晚上都非要睡觉吗 What, so everyone's supposed to sleep every single night now?
你晓得夜晚占了我们时间的一半吧 You realize that nighttime makes up half of all time?
去你的 Damn it!
Jerry Jerry!
Beth Beth!
上帝啊 我爹妈真吵 Oh, my god. My parents are so loud.
我想死 I want to die.
Summer 世上没有上帝 Mm, there is no god, summer.
你现在忍痛接受 You got to rip that band-aid off now.
以后会感谢我的 You'll thank me later.
无意冒犯 Rick 算了吧 管他有意无意 Okay, with all due respect, rick what am I talking about? What respect is due?
你老拉着他去搞这些没完没了的科幻玩意儿 How is my son supposed to pass his classes if you keep dragging
他上的课还怎么过 Him off for high-concept sci-fi rigamarole?
Jerry 我不想多管闲事 Listen, Jerry, I-I don't want to overstep my bounds or anything.
这是你家 It's your house.
你的地盘 It's your world.
你是凯撒大帝 You're a real julius caesar.
但是我觉得学校这种东西 But I'll tell you some tell you how how I feel about school, jerry.
纯属浪费时间 一堆人乱跑乱撞 It's a waste of time. A bunch of people running around, bumping into each other.
前面的人说"二加二" G-guy up front says, "Two plus two."
后面的人说"四" The people in the back say, "Four."
下课铃一响 他们给你一盒牛奶 Then the bell rings, and they give you a carton of milk and a
一张纸 上面写着 Piece of paper that says you can
你可以去上个大号 Go take a dump or something.
学校不适合聪明人待 I mean, it's it's not a place for smart people, Jerry.
我知道不是什么主流观点 但我就这么想的 And I know that's not a popular opinion, but it's my two cents on the issue.
早餐很棒 Beth This was a good breakfast, Beth.
你真是煎得一手好蛋 You really made the crap out of those eggs.
要是你妈妈也能吃到就好了 I wish your mother was here to eat them.
噢 爸爸 Oh, dad.
啥 What?
没搞错吧 For real?
都坐好 All right, now, everybody get settled.
离窗户远点 Get away from the windows!
今天我们要来点真家伙 Now, look, we're gonna be dealing with some real serious stuff today.
你们可能听说过 You might have heard of it.
叫做数学 It's called math.
没了数学 我们都不会存在 现在开始吧 And without it, none of us would even exist, so let's jump right in.
二加二 two plus two.
Jessica Jessica.
五加五 Five plus five.
十ssica Tenssica.
很好 Okay, good.
现在小测验 It's time for the quiz.
叫鬼啊 Yeah, you know what?! Aw, too bad!
乖乖写 Tough!
第一排拿一张 First row, take one.
剩下的往后传 Pass it back for me.
这里竞争是很激烈的 The stakes are high in this room.
每天都有生死攸关的事发生 There's crucial things happening here every day.
有人越来越聪明 People getting smarter.
有人越来越蠢 Some of y'all getting dumber.
有的人根本看不到三点的太阳 Some of y'all ain't gonna see 3:00.
嗨 Morty Hi, Morty.
哇哦 Whoa!
嗨 Jessica Hi, Jessica.
想看看吗 Can I show these to you?
哇 Wow.
棒极了耶 Th-they're both great.
谢谢 Thank you.
你知道我管它们叫啥吗 You know what I named these?
我的小Motry My little morties.
好荣幸 但有点诡异 Uh, that's flattering... and a little weird.
知道我想让你干嘛吗 Do you know what I want you to do with them?
重新取个名字 Rename them?
好好捏 Squeeze them.
使劲揉 Manhandle them.
大力不要停 Give them the business.
好好让它们爽一爽 See if you can shuffle them. I mean, really get in there and knock them around.
怎样都可以 No wrong answers.
哇 Wow.
好吧 Jessica Well, okay, Jessica.
我试试吧 L-let's give this a shot.
嗯 Mm.
Morty Oh, Morty.
你在对我做什么 What are you doing to me?
我在努力了 Uh, I-I'm just doing my best.
Morty Morty!
你在对我做什么 What are you doing to me?!
Jessica Jessica.
Morty Morty!
Jessica Jessica.
再来五分钟 Five more minutes of this,
我就要生气了 And I'm gonna get mad.
Jessica Je-jessica.
Jessica Jessica.
这可不是我的错 Not my fault this is happening.
看呐 Well, well, well.
Frank 早上好 Uh, morning, Frank.
"早上好" 你什么意思 "Morning"? What was what is that supposed to mean?
你在取笑我吗 You making fun of me?
你这是在暗示我家里穷吗 Are you trying to say my family's poor?
Frank 没必要动刀子吧 Oh, geez, frank. I don't know if a knife is necessary.
不用刀子也能搞定啊 I mean, you know, y-you kind of had things handled without it.
轮得到你来教我吗 You telling me how to bully now?
这你就错了 Morty Big mistake, Morty.
现在我要砍了你 因为我家有钱 And now I'm gonna cut you, 'cause my family's rich.
你在这儿啊 Morty There you are, Morty.
听我说 Listen to me.
我要去另外一个次元办点事儿 I got an errand to run in a whole different dimension.
我需要帮手 I need an extra pair of hands.
天啊 Rick 你把Frank咋了 Oh, geez, Rick. W-what'd you do to frank?
很明显啊Morty 我把他冻住了 It's pretty obvious, Morty. I froze him.
我需要你帮忙 Now listen. I need your help, morty.
我们赶紧离离离开这儿 I mean, we got we got to get get the hell out of here
去办事儿 And go take care of business.
很重要 快来 Morty It's important. Come on, morty.
我不知道 Rick I don't know, rick.
我不能再逃学了 I-I can't leave school again.
你知道去那边有多危险吗 Do you have any concept of how much higher the stakes get out there, Morty?
你觉得我一个人能行吗 What do you think? I can just do it all by myself?
快来 Come on!
好吧 Aw, geez. Okay.
我或许可以翘一节历史 I guess I can skip history.
Frank咋办 What about Frank?
你是不是该给他解冻 I mean, shouldn't you unfreeze him?
等会儿再说 I'll do it later, Morty.
他没事的 He'll be fine.
我们走 Let's go.
天 我要遇上Frank Palicky了 Oh, my god. I'm about to walk past frank Palicky.
这就是以后讲给我们孩子听的邂逅啊 This is the story we'll be telling our children.
嗨Frank Hi, Frank.
啊 Aah!
手术刀 Scalpel.
给 Scalpel.
咚咚咚 Knock, knock.
Jerry Jerry?
经理给了一小时的午餐时间 My manager gave me an hour for lunch, and I thought,
我就想"干嘛不来我老婆上班的地方看看呢" "Hey, why not swing by where your wife works?"
它快不行了 We're losing him.
好了 稳住了 Okay, he's back.
Jerry 请务必告诉我你有非来不可的理由 Jerry, please tell me you're here for an incredibly urgent reason.
午餐啊 Well, it's lunch.
数千年来的三餐之一啊 I mean, it's one of three meals that have existed for millennia.
不行了 Losing him.
稳定了 Stabilized.
Jerry你知道我这么说 是因为我的工作是心外科手术吧 Okay, I only ask, Jerry, because, as you know, my job involves performing heart surgery.
是啊是啊 给马做的 Well, yeah, on horses.
你说啥 Excuse me?
好吧 这个问题咱别再吵了 Okay. Let's not rehash that fight.
我明白你很忙 我这就走 I sense that you're busy and will now be on my way.
哇哦 Whoa!
地上这是啥呀 What is this on the floor?
这家养老院看着真是好啊 Some kind of literature for a really nice-looking nursing home.
亲爱的 突发奇想 咱把你爸送进去吧 Hey, honey, crazy idea bad pitch let's put your dad here.
把你爸送进养老院吧 Let's put your dad in a nursing home.
不行了 We're losing him.
Tom 我知道它快不行了 Hey, Tom. We know when we're losing him.
这哔哔叫我听得见 We can hear the beeps!
好了 来吧 Morty 我们走 There she is. All right. Come on, Morty. Let's go.
好吧 Oh, geez. Okay.
天啊 Rick Oh, man, Rick.
这是个啥地方 What is this place?
这是35c次元 这儿的气候非常适合一种特殊的树 It's dimension 35c, and it's got the perfect climate conditions for a special type of
叫做奇异树 Tree, morty, called a mega tree,
树上有果子 果子里有种子 And there's fruit in those trees, and there's seeds in those fruits.
那就是奇异种 I'm talking about mega seeds.
这种种子非常强大 我的研究需要这些种子 They're they're incredibly powerful, and I need them to help me with my research, Morty.
Rick 我看了下四周 Oh, man, Rick. I'm looking around this place,
总觉得有点怕怕的呢 And I'm starting to work up some anxiety about this whole thing.
好吧好吧 All right. All right.
冷静点 听我说 Morty Calm down. Listen to me, morty.
我知道人在新环境里会感到不安 I know that new situations can be intimidating.
你看周围 又吓人又陌生 You're looking around, and it's all scary and different, but,
迎头而上 像一头公牛一样冲过去 You know, m-meeting them head on, charging right into them like a bull
这样人才能成长 that's how we grow as people.
我经常遇到可怕的事 I'm no stranger to scary situations.
我一直在和它们打交道 I deal with them all the time.
你跟着我 Now, if you just stick with me, Morty,
我们一定会 妈呀 快跑 Morty we're gonna be... Holy crap, Morty, run!
我这辈子都没见过这玩意儿 I never seen that thing before in my life.
这到底是啥鬼东西啊 I don't even know what the hell it is!
快跑啊Morty We got to get out of here, morty!
它会杀了我们的 It's gonna kill us!
我们要挂了 We're gonna die!
我们要挂了 We're gonna die, morty!
Morty 深呼吸 Oh, Morty, take a deep breath.
呼吸点新鲜空气 Breathe that, breathe that fresh air in, morty.
闻到没 Y-you smell that?
充满了冒险气息啊 Morty That's the smell of adventure, Morty.
一条完全不同的进化之路的味道 That's that's the smell of of of of a whole different evolutionary timeline.
好了Rick All right, Rick,
还要多久啊 Look how much longer is this gonna be?
我是不是该回学校了 Shouldn't I be back at school by now?
开什么玩笑 Are you joking me?
看看你周围这些鬼玩意儿 I mean, look at all the crazy crap surrounding us.
看那边那个 Look at that thing right there.
这是什么鬼 W-what the hell is that thing?
你觉得你在学校能看见 You think you're gonna see that kind of thing at school?
看它滚来滚去 Look at it just lumbering around.
无法用逻辑理解 It defies all logic that thing.
Rick 我明白 Yeah, Rick, I get it.
我们周围全是怪物 We're surrounded by monsters.
所以我才想走啊 That's kind of the reason why I want to leave.
看见了吗 Morty Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta. Morty, you see this?
看见下面是什么了吗 You see what we just stumbled upon, morty?
知道是啥吗 Any idea what that is down there?
奇异树吗 The mega trees?
没错Morty That's right, Morty
长着果子的奇异树 The mega trees with the mega fruit on them.
我要的就是这个呀 Morty 种子就在那儿 And that's what I'm talking about, morty. That's where my seeds are.
如果我们按你说的来 那就永远找不到了 If we would have done what you wanted, I would have never have
因为你如此迷恋你的学校 Found them, because y because you're so in love with school.
好吧 好吧 All right, all right.
这些种子到底有什么特别的 So, what's so special about these seeds, anyways?
Morty 别问这么多问题 You ask a lot of questions, Morty.
这样不好 Not very charismatic.
很碍事的 It makes you kind of an under underfoot figure.
穿上这鞋子 Morty Just take these shoes, Morty.
这是特制的吸附鞋 They're sp special grappling shoes.
只要穿着这宝贝儿 When you're wearing these things ba these babies,
你想往哪儿走往哪儿走 You can basically just walk on any surface you want, Morty
往上 往下 倒立 转到左边 Up, down, below, turn around to the left.
怎么都行 These things really bring it all together.
啊 Aah!
Morty 你得先启动它们 You have to turn them on, Morty!
先把鞋子的开关打开 The shoes have to be turned on!
我绝不会送我爸去养老院 I am not putting my father in a home!
他才刚回到我的生活中 He just came back into my life,
你就想这么把他塞床垫下面 And you want to grab him and stuff him under a mattress
跟上月的维多利亚的秘密产品目录为伍吗 like last month's victoria's secret?
我说了我是在给你订情人节礼物嘛 I told you I was ordering you something for valentine's day.
而且你爸对我们的孩子有很不好的影响 More importantly, your father is a horrible influence on our son.
你们没问题吧 Beth Everything cool in here, Beth?
没事的 Davin It's fine, Davin.
那就好 Okay, cool.
我们今天一起完成了一件伟大的事 You know, we did something great today.
没什么比马儿的心脏更高贵自由了 There's nothing more noble and free than the heart of a horse.
既然我们在吵架 Since we're fighting,
如果你跟那家伙有过什么 If you ever have an affair with that guy,
我就去酒店房间吞子弹 I will come to the hotel room and blow my brains out
把脑浆全崩到你的裸体上 all over your naked bodies.
我理解你承受的压力 Look, I appreciate the stress you're under,
但是Morty早在我爸搬进来前 but morty was having trouble in school way
学习就有问题了 Before my dad moved in,
我唯一能看到Rick带来的影响就是 这么久以来 and the only influence I can see rick having is that, for the first time in his life,
Morty第一次有了朋友 Morty has a friend.
或许你是对的 Well, maybe you're right.
或许是吧 Uh, yeah, maybe I am.
我是我爸的女儿 I'm my father's daughter.
我很聪明 I'm smart.
不然咋当上心外科医生的 Why do you think I'm a heart surgeon?
马心外科医生 Horse heart surgeon.
你好 Hello?
Smith太太吗 Mrs. Smith?
我是阴道校长 别做联想 This is principal Vagina no relation.
请问你和Morty的父亲今天下午能 I wonder if you and morty's father might be able to have a
过来谈谈吗 Chat with me this afternoon?
Morty你把你的腿弄得真惨 Morty, oh, you really d-did a number on your legs right now.
你得把开关打开 这鞋子才能用啊 You know, you got to turn the shoes on, morty, for them to work.
看我的打开了 Yeah, look I turned mine on.
我下来的多顺当 I had no problem getting down here.
简直是轻松愉快 It was a leisurely breeze.
我快疼死了 Rick I'm in a lot of pain, rick.
嗯 我看得出来 Yeah, I can see that.
不过你应该还能帮我把种子采来的吧 But do you think you'll still be able to help me collect my seeds, morty?
开什么玩笑 Are you kidding me?!
够了 Rick That's it, Rick!
我忍不了了 That's the last straw!
简直不敢相信 I can't believe this
我两条腿都断了 I'm sitting here with both of my legs broken,
你还要我去帮你弄种子 and you're still asking me about getting those seeds?!
嗷嗷嗷 Ooh! Ow! Oh!
你是个怪物 Y-y-you're a monster.
跟希特勒似的 至少希特勒心里还装着德国 Y-you're like hitler, but but even hitler cared about Germany or something.
好吧 等我一下 Morty Okay, hold on just a second, morty.
哇哦Rick 这个一下就治好了我的腿 Wow, Rick. That stuff just healed my broken legs instantly.
这辈子没觉得这么好过 I mean, I've never felt so good in my life.
谢谢 Thank you.
别管了 Morty Don't worry about it, Morty.
快过来帮我弄种子 Just come help me get these seeds, all right, buddy?
没问题 Rick Sure thing, Rick.
虽然你没问 Not that you asked,
不过刚才我去了一个未来的次元 Morty, but what just happened there is I went into a future
医学高度发达 Dimension with such advanced medicine
治断腿的血清到处的药店都有卖的 that they had broken-leg serum at every corner drugstore.
这种东西满街都是 The stuff was all over the place, morty.
听上去好厉害啊 Rick Wow, that's pretty crazy, Rick.
就是有个小问题 There's just one problem, Morty, one little hang-up.
我去的次元太发达了 The dimension I visited was so advanced,
他们抑制了衰老 they had also halted the aging process,
那儿的每个人都很年轻 也从未老过 and everyone there was young, morty, and they had been forever.
我是那儿唯一的老人 I was the only old person there, morty.
在那儿 我就像一个名人般 It was like I was some sort of, you know, celebrity, walking around.
他们觉得我可迷人了 I-I was fascinating to them.
那边有很多美女 There were a lot of attractive Women there, morty,
她们都想和我共度良宵 and they they they they all wanted time with me.
我和很多美女玩得非常开心 I had a lot of fun with a lot of young ladies,
但我在那边待太久了 次元传送装置它 but I spent so much time there, my interdimensional portal device
没有能量了 it's got no charge left, Morty.
没有能量了 It's got no charge left.
啥 What?!
它现在就是一废物 It's as good as garbage, morty.
已经没用了 It's not gonna work anymore, morty.
Rick 这可不妙 Oh, geez, Rick, that's not good.
那我们怎么办 W-what are we gonna do?
我现在得回学校了 I-I have to be back at school right now.
我们要怎么回家 How are we gonna get back home?
有很多办法可以回家 There's ways to get back home, Morty.
只是麻烦点而已 It's just it's just gonna be a little bit of a hassle.
我们得去过空间海关 We're gonna have to go through interdimensional customs,
所以我还得要你帮个忙 so you're gonna have to do me a real solid.
啊哦 Uh-oh.
我们到海关的时候 When we get to customs,
你得把这些种子 I'm gonna need you to take these seeds
带去洗手间 into the bathroom,
深深的塞进你的屁股里 and I'm gonna need you to put them way up inside your butthole, Morty.
塞进屁股里 In my butt?
往里塞 越深越好 Put them way up inside there, as far as they can fit.
天啊 Rick Oh, geez, Rick.
我真不想这样 I really don't want to have to do that.
总得有人要做的啊 Morty Well, somebody's got to do it, Morty.
不塞进直肠里 这些种子 Th-these seeds aren't gonna get through customs
过不了海关的 unless they're in someone's rectum, morty.
如果我来的话会直接掉出来 And they'll fall right out of mine.
我塞过太多次了 I've done this too many times, morty.
你还年轻 I mean, you're young.
你还有大好人生 肛门也还紧致有弹性 You've got your whole life ahead of you, and your anal cavity is still taut, yet malleable.
帮帮外公吧 Morty You got to do it for Grandpa, morty.
把这种子塞屁股里吧 Y-you've got to put these seeds inside your butt.
塞屁股里 In my butt?
求你了 Morty Come on, morty. Please, morty.
你一定要帮我 Morty You have to do it, Morty.
天啊 Oh, man.
事情是这样的 你们的儿子Morty The fact is, your son, morty,
过去的两个月里一共只上了七个小时的学 Has attended this school for a total of seven hours over the last two months.
啥 What?
你之前为什么没有通知我们 Why didn't you notify us?
我早通知过你们 I done been notifying you.
你们没收到 Have you not been getting the messages
我留给Morty外公的消息吗 I've been leaving with morty's grandfather?
哈 Boom!
我就说吧 Told you! In your face!
我们的孩子快让他毁了 He is ruining our child!
等等 我这么高兴干嘛 Wait, what am I celebrating?
我就觉得有点可疑 Yeah, see, I thought something was fishy there,
因为总是Morty的外公把他从学校接走 Because it's usually morty's grandpa that's taking him out of school.
Summer Summer?
上帝怎么会让这种事发生 What kind of god lets this happen?
这儿出了点小意外 We had a little incident.
有个学生被冻死了 A student was frozen to death.
没有任何证据表明是拉丁裔的学生干的 And there's no evidence that a latino student did it!
总有人想扯到民族问题上去 Everyone wants to take this to a racial place.
我不会让他们得逞的 I won't let them.
我跟他说"把blimfarx给我" So, I told him, "Give me the blimfarx," You know?
这人根本不懂星际货币 This this guy he doesn't understand interstellar currency.
我想吃点胡言乱语 It's, like, I'm trying to eat a flimflam like,
因为咱Girvonesk星就吃这 that's what we eat on Girvonesk.
我不喜欢这儿 Morty I don't like it here, Morty.
我忍不了这种官僚主义 I can't abide bureaucracy.
我不喜欢让人指手画脚 I don't like being told where to go and what to do.
我觉得这是对我的冒犯 I consider it a violation.
你把种子塞屁股里了吗 Did you get those seeds all the way up your butt?
是的Rick Yeah, rick.
咱能快点吗 Let's just get this over with, okay?
这些东西尖尖的 I mean, these things are pointy.
很疼的 They hurt.
这说明品质好 That means they're good ones.
你是个好孩子Morty You're a good kid, Morty.
这些种子对我的研究非常重要 Those mega seeds are super valuable to my work.
你帮了我一个大忙 You've been a huge help to me.
有了这些我什么都能干了 I'm gonna be able to do all kind of things with them.
这真是太好了Morty It's gonna be great, Morty.
什么样的科学都行 All kinds of science.
下一个 Okay, next through.
除了你 你去那边 Except you. You go over there.
为什么他就得去那边 Why does he have to go over there?
抽查 Random check.
他要过那边的新机器 He's got to go through the new machine.
什么新机器 What new what new machine?
就一新机器 It's a new machine.
能检查你的屁股深处 It detects stuff all the way up your butt.
跑啊 Morty 快跑 Run, Morty! Run!
啊 Aah!
拉警报 Red alert!
别管它 Don't think about it!
聪明啊 Morty Oh, nice, Morty!
青出于蓝胜于蓝 The student becomes the teacher.
当然不了 Aw, hell, no, dawg.
我只是想 啊啊啊 You know me I'm just trying to... Aah!
我得输入我们自己世界的坐标 I need to type in the coordinates to our home world, morty.
掩护我 Cover me.
天啊 我不想开枪打人 Oh, man. I mean, you know, I-I don't want to shoot nobody.
他们是机器人Morty 随便打 他们是机器人 They're just robots, Morty! It's okay to shoot them! They're robots!
我的腿被打断了 My leg is shot off!
Glenn要失血而死了 Glenn's bleeding to death!
谁通知下他老婆孩子 Someone call his wife and children!
他们不是机器人啊Rick They're not robots, Rick!
这是修辞 Morty It's a figure of speech, Morty.
他们都是官僚体系的走狗 没关系的 They're bureaucrats. I don't respect them.
接着打 Morty Just keep shooting, Morty.
你不明白这里的监狱有多可怕 You have no idea what prison is like here!
天啊 Holy crap!
这太疯狂了 This is insane!
走 Morty Come on, morty!
我们离开这儿 We got to get the hell out of here!
哇哦 Wow.
你刚刚是穿过传送门进了食堂吗 Did you just come into the cafeteria through a portal?
是啊 Uh, yeah.
因为我的法拉利还在店里嘛 Well, you know, my my ferrari's in the shop.
开玩笑的 Ju just kidding.
你是Morty 是吗 You're Morty, right?
是的 Yeah.
你可以晚点找他要电话 You can get his number later.
Morty 我们走 Come on, Morty. We got to get out of here.
你得去把种子从屁股里弄出来 You got to get those seeds out of your ass.
看呐 亲爱的 Oh, look, Honey.
这不是咱儿子和阿尔伯特 爱因撕蛋吗 It's our son with Albert Ein-douche.
啥 What?
我是愤怒的父亲 又不是即兴演说家 I'm an angry father, not an improvisor.
噢嗨 Jerry Oh, hi, Jerry.
天啦 Morty Oh, my goodness, Morty!
你怎么没在上课 What are you doing out of class?
我不是和你说过了吗 你爸妈和我 We talked about this. Your your parents and I
对这种行为都感到很失望 are very disappointed in in this behavior.
没人信吗 No? No takers?
别碰这些东西 You guys should really not be touching that stuff.
这些超出你们的理解范围的 It's beyond your reasoning.
你才超出我们的理解 You're beyond our reasoning!
彼此彼此 Takes one to know one.
爸 你怎么能让我们的儿子缺了整整一学期的课呢 Dad, how could you make my son miss an entire semester of school?
他又不是漂亮妹子 I mean, it's not like he's a hot girl.
挥霍完青春再找一长期饭票 He can't just bail on his life and set up shop in someone else's.
你们搬我东西干嘛 What what are you guys doing with my stuff?
我们要把你送进养老院 We're moving you... to a nursing home.
养老院 A nursing home?
你疯了吧 What are what are you, nuts?
我是个天才 I'm a genius.
我造机器人玩的 I build robots for fun.
那你可以去做篮子 Well, now you can build baskets
用录影机看保罗纽曼的电影 and watch Paul Newman movies on vhs and
在圣诞节的时候给童子军留下心灵创伤 mentally scar the boy scouts every christmas.
这什么意思 What does that mean?
私事 It's personal.
爸妈 别这样 Dad, mom, c-come on.
Rick只是要我帮忙而已 Rick just needed my help is all.
Morty 别来搅和 Morty, stay out of this.
你自己显然没有足够的判断力 You are obviously not capable of judging these situations on your own.
你这是说Morty什么呢 What are you trying to say about morty?
说他笨吗 That he's stupid or something?
别抢占道德制高点了 Oh, don't high-road us, dad.
你明知道Morty根本缺不起课的 You know fully well that morty is the last child that needs to be missing classes.
我不明白你想说什么 I-I-I don't know what you mean by that.
能再具体点吗 Can can can you be a little bit more specific?
天啊 Oh, for crying out
他有点缺陷什么的 He's got some kind of disability or something.
你就想让我们说这个吗 Is that what you want us to say?
真的吗 I do?
不是吗 孩子 Well, duh doy, son.
我爱你 孩子 Look, I love you, morty, but we both
但我们都清楚 你没别的孩子机灵 know you're not as fast as the other kids, and
如果你想有所成就 就得加倍努力 if you want to compete in this world, you got to work twice as hard.
天啊 老爸 Aw, geez, dad.
你突然和一个小孩子说这些 太沉重了吧 Y-you know, that's a lot to drop on a kid all at once.
Morty 告诉你爸妈圆周率的平方根 Morty, t-tell your parents the square root of pi.
别这样 Rick Oh, come on, Rick.
你知道我不行的 You know I can't.
圆周率的平方根 The square root of pi,
Morty 来吧 Morty go.
1.77245385 1.77245385.
哇哦 Whoa!
怎么搞的 What the hell?
天啊 他说的对 Holy crap. He's right.
Morty 热力学第一定律 Morty, tell your parents the first law of thermodynamics.
"一个系统内能的增加等于 "The increment in the internal energy of a system is
等于该系统吸收的热量" Equal to the increment of heat supplied to the system."
哇 我好聪明 Wow! I'm so smart!
可是 But
我早跟你们说了学校这玩意儿很蠢 I told the both of you school is stupid.
在那儿学不到东西的 It's not how you learn things.
Morty很有天分 Morty's a gifted child.
他很特别 He has a special mind.
所以他才是我的小助手 That's why he's my little helper.
他就像我 He's like me.
他日后会从事伟大的科学工作 He's gonna be doing great science stuff later in his life.
他太聪明了 学校不适合他 He's too smart for school.
他得继续帮我 H-he needs to keep hanging out and helping me.
Jerry 我不希望这一切就这么结束了 Jerry, I don't want whatever's happening here to stop.
我明白 No, I-I understand.
可能是我们反应过度了 Uh, maybe we overreacted.
但他还得继续上学 But he has to keep going to school.
好吧Jerry Okay, Jerry.
你真会开条件 但我能干嘛呢 You drive a hard bargain, but what am I supposed to do?
说不吗 Say say no?
这里毕竟你说了算 You you really wear the pants around here.
我想让你们知道 从现在开始 I just want you to know, between us, from now on,
我们互相保证百分百的诚实和公开 it's gonna be 100% honesty and open, clear communication.
Frank Palicky今天被冻死了 Frank Palicky was frozen to death today!
完全不知道你在说啥 No idea what you're talking about.
行 Okay.
Morty 再过一个小时你就该上床了 Well, uh, Morty, it's your bedtime in an hour.
别再熬夜了 Don't stay up all night again.
不过这挺好的 This is good, though.
这样能行 This can work.
我们能做一家人 I think we can be a family.
Beth 如果你愿意的话 我想和你去床上 And now, Beth, if you'll have me, I would love to have you.
你猜咋的 You know what?
好嘞 Okay.
天啊 Rick Holy cow, Rick.
我都不知道和你在一起让我变聪明了 I didn't know hanging out with you was making me smarter.
其实吧 没有这回事 Full disclosure, morty it's not.
暂时的超常智力只是 Temporary superintelligence is just a side effect
奇异种溶解在你肠道里的副作用 of the mega seeds dissolving in your rectal cavity.
噢 Aw, man.
一旦种子的效力过去 你会失去大部分运动机能 Yeah, and once those seeds wear off, you're gonna lose most of your motor Skills,
以及大部分的大脑功能 持续七十二小时 and you're also gonna lose a significant amount of brain functionality for 72 hours, morty.
从现在开始 Starting right about now.
天啊 Ohh, man.
我很抱歉Morty 不幸的是你确实很蠢 I'm sorry, morty. It's a bummer. In reality, you're as dumb as they come.
我真的很需要那些种子 And I needed those seeds real bad,
我不得不放弃它们好让你父母别来烦我 and I had to give them up just to get your parents off my back,
因此 我们得去搞来更多的种子 so now we're gonna have to go get more.
在那之后我们还要有更多的冒险 Morty And then we're gonna go on even more adventures after that, morty.
而你要保持沉默 Morty And you're gonna keep your mouth shut about it, morty, because
因为世上充满了分不清轻重的傻瓜 The world is full of idiots that don't understand what's important,
他们会试图分开我们 and they'll tear us apart, morty.
但只要你跟着我 我就能完成伟业 But if you stick with me, I'm gonna accomplish great things,
你也会是伟业的一部分 Morty, and you're gonna be part of them,
我们一起东奔西走 and together, we're gonna run around, Morty.
做各种奇妙的事情 We're gonna do all kinds of wonderful things, morty.
- 就你和我 Morty - 不啊不 - Just you and me, morty. - Oh, no, no.
外面的世界是我们的敌人 The outside world is our enemy, morty.
我们的朋友只有彼此 We're the only friends we've got, Morty.
只有Rick和Morty It's just rick and morty
Rick和Morty大冒险 Rick and morty and their adventures, morty.
Rick与Morty万年录 Rick and morty forever and forever 100 years
Rick与Morty的故事 rick and morty's things.
Rick与Morty游记 Me and rick and morty running around,
Rick与Morty的时光 and rick and morty time.
一整天 到永远 All day long, forever.
一百年 All a hundred days.
Rick与Morty一百遍 Rick and morty forever 100 times.
一遍又一遍 Over and over,
瑞克莫蒂大冒险.com rickandmortyadventures.Com.
www.瑞克与莫蒂.com www.Rickandmorty.Com.
www.瑞克与莫蒂的大冒险.一百年 www.Rickandmortyadventures. All 100 years.
每分每秒 瑞克莫蒂.com EVERY MINUTE, rickandmorty.Com.
www.瑞克莫蒂一百遍.com www.100timesrickandmorty.Com.
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