一年前....
我这么做是为了墙国的好 I'm doing this for the good of the wall.
-为了墙国 -墙国 - For the Wall! - The Wall!
公爵死了 The Duke is dead.
什么 我们不确定他死没有 What? We don't know that he's dead.
我不掌管墙国 我只是住在其中 I'm not in charge of the Wall. I just live in it.
为什么 Why?
没人需要知道这有出路 Nobody needs to know there's a way out.
他们能做什么 I mean, what are they gonna do?
跑出去然后被猫头鹰吃掉吗 Run out there and get eaten by an owl?
不 在这里建立一个新世界更安全更好 No. It's safer and better to build a new world here.
我 我信了 我信了你 I... I believed. I believed in you.
而我相信墙国 And I believe in the Wall.
谢谢你帮我实现我的命运 Thank you for helping me reach my destiny.
谢天谢地我总是随身携带一颗巨型樱桃 Thank God I always keep a Cherry Blast Gusher on me.
操 我的小腿断了 Fuck! My tiny leg is broken!
操你妈 蒂姆 我不会死在这里 Fuck you, Tim. I'm not dying out here.
我不会死在这里 I am not dying out here.
我不会死在这里 I am... not dying out here.
外星也难民 第二季 第七集
得到树上去 Gotta get up in a tree.
就像《侏罗纪公园》里一样 你在树上总是安全 Just like in Jurassic Park, you're always safe in a tree.
你在树上安全 You're safe in a tree.
树上安全 Safe in a tree.
真希望我没扔掉那个巨型樱桃 Ugh, I wish I hadn't thrown out that Gusher.
-你还没死 -什么鬼 - You're not dead? - What the fuck?
这是为了你伤害过的所有人 This is for everyone you hurt.
谁知道一只卡车大小的负鼠能这么烦人 Who knew a truck-sized possum would be such a little bitch?
-那只是一只幼崽 -那它妈妈在哪 - That was just a baby. - Then where's its mother?
什么鬼 What the hell?
靠 挡住那道门 Shit, barricade that door!
快 Hurry!
这是什么地方 What is this place?
-小孩的玩具 太空飞船 -什么 - Kid's toy. A spaceship. - What?
具体点 是07年电影《异形大战铁血战士2》里的 Specifically, the Predator spaceship playset
太空飞船套装 from the 2007 movie Alien Versus Predator: Requiem.
那是混血异形 That's the Predalien.
外星人和掠夺者的混血 The alien-slash-Predator hybrid.
所以我才知道这是来自第二部 That's how I know this set is from Requiem
而不是第一部 and not the original AvP.
混血异形只存在于续集里 The Predalien was only in the sequel.
不需要你给我解释混血异形 Don't you dare mansplain the Predalien to me.
它出现在了第一部电影的结尾 It appears in the final moments of the first film,
所以严格来说两部都有 傻逼 so it's technically in both movies, you dumb bitch.
行 你也了解《异形大战铁血战士》 Okay, you know your AvP.
我猜猜 你跟着我从墙国出来杀我 Let me guess: you followed me out of the Wall to kill me
就是为了完成你和你朋友蒂姆搞起来的事 to finish what your old pal Tim started.
蒂姆 Tim.
-又错了 -什么 那你为什么... - Wrong again. - What? Then why did you--
我不想谈 I don't want to talk about it.
那是什么 What's all that?
我准备的东西 Some stuff I put together
以防万一我需要逃离墙国 in case I ever had to escape the Wall.
每个人都说 你不需要应急包 Everybody was always like, "You won't need the bag."
你为什么会需要应急包 "Why would you ever need the bag?"
看样子我像往常一样又对了 Yeah, well, looks like I was right again, as usual.
-鞭炮 -是的 - Firecracker? - Oh yeah.
我们可以朝负鼠扔过去 We could throw it at the possum.
多半只会激怒它 It would probably just piss it off.
-这是什么 -普瑞来 - What's this? - Purell.
你得抹点在你的腿上 You gotta put something on that leg
如果你不想感染的话 if you don't want to get an infection.
-谢谢 -我仍然恨你 - Thanks. - Hey, I still hate you,
但我需要你活着 保持警觉 but I need you alive and alert
如果你要帮我保卫这地方的话 if you're gonna help me secure this place.
给 Here.
-谢谢 -声明下 - Thanks. - Just to be clear,
一旦我们从这出去 我还是会刺你的眼睛 once we're out of here, I'm still going to stab you in the eye.
我为了我的人民做了我必须做的 You know, I did what I had to do for the good of my people.
他们不是你的人民 They weren't your people!
你是个愚蠢的恐怖分子 You're a stupid terrorist
毁了我们社会 who destroyed our society's only chance
唯一获得安宁稳定的机会 at peace and stability.
你应该尽情操你自己 You should feel free to go fuck yourself.
-你倒是想 -就跟我会在这种事上浪费许愿机会一样 - You wish. - Like I would waste a wish on that?
是啊 你倒是想 Yeah, right. You wish.
真是被你怼赢了呢 Wow, you really got me.
时间不早了 我守第一班 It's getting late. I'll take first watch.
我才不可能让你坐在那看我睡觉 No way I'm sleeping with you sitting there.
我守第一班 I'll take first watch.
行 不过你休想趁我睡觉时摸我的屌 Fine. But don't you dare touch my penis while I'm asleep.
什么 我绝不会碰你恶心的屌 What? I would never touch your disgusting penis!
很好 从没有人碰过 Good. No one has ever touched it
今晚也不会改变 and that sure as hell isn't changing tonight!
等等 Wai--
淡定 你的树枝在那边 Relax. Your twig's over there.
我清理了血渍还帮你磨尖了 I cleaned off the blood and sharpened it for you.
谢谢 Thank you.
客气 吃早餐吗 De nada. Breakfast?
我在煮蘑菇 我在角落里找到的 I'm cooking mushrooms. I found them in the corner.
-不 我要走了 -不行 - No, I'm out of here. - That's not an option.
如果我们俩出去 那只老负鼠会杀了我们的 If either of us step outside, old lady possum will kill us.
-外面什么都没有 -相信我 杰夫看着呢 - There's nothing there. - Trust me, Jeff's watching.
我决定叫它"杰夫" Also, I've decided to call her "Jeff."
我知道它是母的 但我以前有个室友 I know it's a girl, but I had a roommate once
长得就跟负鼠一样 他名叫杰夫 who had a face just like a possum and his name was Jeff.
它为什么在等我们 Why is she waiting for us?
街上有那么多垃圾箱 There are trash cans up and down the street
里面的食物更好找吧 that have easier food.
我们所面临的情况类似《大白鲨2》 I think we have a Jaws 2 situation on our hands,
鲨鱼妈妈为了死去的孩子 the one where the momma shark
而找他们复仇 gets revenge on them for killing her kid.
它大脑只有花生那么大 Her brain's the size of a peanut,
它能记仇多久 how long could she hold a grudge?
几小时 几天 几个月 Hours, days, months?
-几个月 -也可能 - Months? - It's also possible
你和我已经死了 这里是地狱 that you and I are already dead and this is Hell.
那样的话 我们只能永远待在这里了 In that case, we'll be here for all eternity.
你真是满嘴狗屁 我愿意到外面冒险 You're full of shit. I'll take my chances outside.
要吃早餐吗 So, how about that breakfast?
我猜你肯定很想回到 I imagine you're pretty eager to get back
你在墙国内的恐怖分子朋友身边吧 to your terrorist pals in the Wall.
他们多半在策划什么极端主义派对 Oh, they're probably planning some big extremist party
庆祝他们成功的恐怖行为 to celebrate all their successful terrorizing.
-这太操蛋了 -我永远不会回墙国了 - That's fucked up. - I'm never going back to the Wall.
因为这里很棒吗 Because this is so great?
我说过 我不想谈这事 I told you, I don't want to talk about it.
我表示尊重 I can respect that.
拜托跟我说说 跟我说嘛 Oh, please tell me. Please, please tell me, please--
闭嘴 Shut up!
在我们冲击了宫殿后 蒂姆疯了 After we stormed the palace, Tim went crazy.
他不想告诉任何人有出路 他... He didn't want to tell anyone there was a way out. He--
他捅了我 然后把我从洞口推出 He stabbed me, and he pushed me out the hole.
不是吧 No fucking way.
所以蒂姆正面捅你 So Tim stabbed you in the front
就像他从背后捅我一样 just like he stabbed me in the back.
他没有从背后捅你 He didn't stab you in the back!
我们从一开始就跟你不是一队的 We were never on your side to begin with.
无论如何 听上去很酷 Regardless, it sounded cool.
真是个垃圾 Man, what a piece of shit.
至少我总是告诉你情况是怎样的 At least I always told you what the deal was.
我以为我了解他 我以为他是好人 I thought I knew him. I thought he was a good person.
权力会对人产生疯狂的影响 Power does crazy things to people.
我是例外 我处理得很完美 Uh, not me. I mean, I handled it perfectly
我是一个杰出的领袖 and was an excellent, excellent leader.
你用水淹没了底层 You flooded the bottom levels!
那些人想要烧掉整座墙 People were trying to burn down the whole Wall.
我别无选择 I had no choice!
随便了 至少我们可以一致同意蒂姆是垃圾 Whatever, we can at least both agree that Tim sucks.
我无法想象他掌权下的墙国是什么样子 I can't imagine what's happened to the Wall with him in charge.
他们需要一个真正的领袖 They need a real leader.
-蘑菇怎么样 -难吃死了 - How are the mushrooms? - Disgusting.
你是厨师还是什么 What are you, like a chef or something?
我在进入墙国前 在红花餐厅工作 Before I was put in the Wall, I worked at Benihana.
你在... Uhhh, whoa, what are you--
红花餐厅是我最爱的餐厅 Benihana's my favorite restaurant of all time.
多年来我每周都会光顾两次 I went there twice a week for years!
你认真的吗 油那么重 Are you serious? It's so oily.
你没有经常拉肚子吗 Didn't you get tons of diarrhea?
拉了无数回 Tons and tons of diarrhea!
但能吃到洋葱火山 这点代价不算什么 But that's a small price for an onion volcano.
不仅仅是食物 You know, it's not just food--
而是一种体验 "It's an experience."
红花餐厅的创始人是洛基·青木 So the Benihana founder is Rocky Aoki...
-史蒂夫·青木的父亲 -我不认识 - The father of Steve Aoki. - I don't know who that is.
他是个著名DJ He's like this really famous DJ!
洛基也是戴文·青木的父亲 And Rocky's also the father of Devon Aoki.
-毫无头绪 -超模兼演员 - I'm drawing a blank. - Supermodel-slash-actress.
她参演过《速度与激情》和《罪恶之城》 She was in 2 Fast 2 Furious and Sin City.
这些人很有名吗 And these people are famous?
算是吧 十年前 Kinda, like 10 years ago.
我刚意识到我不知道你真名 I just realized I don't know your real name.
你父母没给你取名"公爵"吧 Your parents didn't name you "The Duke," Right?
-我真名是 -等等 - Well, my real name is-- - Hold on.
看来我不该 Ugh. Guess I shouldn't have gone
多加那个蚂蚁大脑的 for that extra portion of ant brain.
-当然了 -你这什么口气 - Yeah, right. - What's with the tone?
-得了吧 -怎么了 - Oh, come on. - What?
别逼我说出来 男人不该说这事的 Don't make me say it. Guys aren't supposed to bring it up.
什么 别犯贱 我都跟你说了青木的事 What? Stop being a dick, I told you about Aoki.
好吧 很明显你怀孕了 Okay. It's pretty clear that you're pregnant.
什么 不可能 What? No way, that's impossible.
我已经注意到种种迹象有段时间了 I've been seeing signs for a while.
我只是以为你不想谈论 I just assumed you didn't want to talk about it.
谁是父亲 某个红花餐厅的猛男吗 Who's the father, some Benihana hunk?
他怎么做的 把那小虾射进你的口袋吗 What'd he do, shoot that shrimp right into your pocket?
天 部不不不 Oh god... no. No, no, no, no, no.
怎么会这样 This can't be happening.
你月经已经晚来了6到8周 You're also six to eight weeks late on your period.
-什么 -这里面空间这么小 - Excuse me? - It's close quarters in here.
我难道要不注意到你没来月经吗 I'm just supposed to not notice you're not having a period?
是的 Yes!
天 真希望有什么能确定的方法 God, I wish there was a way we could know for sure?
有的 Oh, but there is.
你在干什么 What are you doing?
吉邦尼奶油彩蛋里面的奶油材质 The creme in a Cadbunny Creme Egg is basically made
其实跟做验孕的材质是一样的 of the same stuff used to make pregnancy tests.
这绝对是大错特错 That is one hundred million percent not true.
我在每个硬币上都滴了一点奶油 I put a drop of Cad Creme on each of these dimes
用我们的鸟样来做检测 to test them using our urine samples.
首先 我们看看我的 作为对照物 First, we'll try mine, which will function as the control.
我"对照物"用对了吗 Am I using "Control" Right?
-听上去没问题 -好的 那开始了 - Sounds right. - Okay, here we go.
好 没有反应 Okay, no reaction.
现在我们在看看你的尿液 我喜欢称之为"你尿" Now let's try your urine. Or as I like to call it, "Yourine."
老天 Jesus Christ!
恭喜了 妈妈 Congratulations, Mom.
你不高兴我一直有存我们的尿吗 Aren't you glad I've been saving acorn caps of our urine?
不 这太糟了 No! This is terrible!
拜托 这是奇迹 Hey, come on! This is a miracle!
第一个出生的缩小人 The first baby to be born small!
-不是我的吧 -什么 我们从没做过爱 - It's not mine, is it? - What! We've never even had sex.
很好 你答应不在我睡觉的时候碰我屌 Good. You promised to never touch my penis when I'm asleep,
我指望你能信守承诺 and I expect you to honor that.
孩子他爸是 蒂姆 The father... it's Tim.
你是说混蛋蒂姆 Whoa. You mean asshole Tim?
-是的 -我去 - Yes. - Shit.
难以置信 I can't believe this is happening.
我在外面要怎么照顾一个小孩 How am I going to take care of a child out here?
不管发生什么 Whatever happens,
你和我会一起想办法的 you and I are going to figure this out together.
我保证 I promise you.
等等 你一直在存我们的尿 Wait a second, you've been saving our urine all this time?
我称之为我们尿 I call it our-ine.
你泡那些又暖又苦的澡时 Oh look, you weren't complaining
可没有抱怨 when you took all those warm, bitter baths.
我其实大概也猜到了 Yeah, I guess part of me knew,
但我不想失去 but I just didn't want to lose the option of
把烦恼抛诸脑后的午间泡澡机会 a relaxing midday soak to let my troubles melt away.
原来是尿 Turns out it was piss.
用力 雪莉 用力 Keep pushing, Cherie! Keep pushing!
用力 Push!
我接到了 I've got it!
没有哭 公爵 为什么没有哭 It's not crying, Duke. Why isn't it crying?
是酸橙味小熊软糖 It's a lime Gummy Bear!
雪莉 醒醒 Cherie, wake up!
你又做噩梦了 You're having another nightmare
梦到你生下了糖果 where you give birth to a piece of candy.
太真实了 It was so real.
这次又是什么 特趣巧克力 What was it this time? Twix?
-小熊软糖 -绿色的 - Gummy bear. - Green?
嗯 绿色的 Yeah, it was green.
我的天 我猜对了 Holy shit, I guessed it?
来喝了 你得多喝水 Here, drink this. You gotta stay hydrated.
谢谢 Thanks.
我最近思考了很多 I've been doing some thinking.
《异形大战铁血战士2》飞船套装 This Alien Versus Predator: Requiem playset
不是养孩子的地方 is no place to raise a child.
拜托 Oh, come on.
没错 这不是《宇宙巨人希曼》里 Sure, it's no Masters of the Universe
给希曼和他敌人住的 Castle Grayskull Fortress of Mystery and Power
神秘和力量之骷髅头堡 for He-Man and his Foes,
但也没那么糟 but it's not so bad .
已经开始分崩离析了 It's starting to fall apart.
我们用捕食者杀手的长发绺修补东西 We've patched things with the extra Predator dreadlocks,
但一旦用完 就没有东西 but once those run out, there won't be anything
能保护我们和小孩不受杰夫的伤害了 to protect us and the baby from Jeff.
我都忘了我们把那负鼠叫做杰夫 I forgot we were calling the possum Jeff.
这本来就只该是暂时的住所 This was always meant to be temporary.
婴儿需要真正的医疗补给 A baby needs real medical supplies
和非昆虫类的食物 and non-insect foods.
再说 如果我们能联系到正常大小的人 Plus, if we could get in contact with some regular-sized people,
或许还有机会恢复到原来的大小 there's a chance we could be turned regular size again ourselves.
可我们能去哪呢 But where could we even go?
我们必须前往幸福健康的角落 We have to go to the corner of happy and healthy.
沃格林 你疯了吗 The Wallgreans? Are you crazy?
步行的话会走好几周 It would take weeks to reach on foot.
我知道 但为了孩子我们必须这么做 I know. But we have to do it for the sake of the child.
你如此夸张地说"孩子" 听起来好怪 It's so weird when you say "The child" All dramatic like that.
-拜托不要这样 -再说一次 - Please stop. - Just one more time.
-行吧 -为了孩子 - Fine. - For the sake of the child!
而且 除了沃格林 Anyway, besides Wallgreans,
唯一的选择就是墙国 the only other option would be the Wall.
好吧 也许我们可以尝试去沃格林 但杰夫呢 Okay, maybe we try for Wallgreans. But what about Jeff?
绕过它完全不可能 Getting past her will be impossible.
或者我该说 "负可能" Dare I say... im-possum-able.
当我们齐心协力时 没有什么负可能 When we work together, nothing is im-possum-able.
-我们真要这么做吗 -没错 - We're really doing this? - We're doing it.
我一打开门 你就冲向草线 Soon as I open the door, make a break for the grass line.
我帮你殿后 I'll get your back.
也许我们该留下 Maybe we should just stay here
加固外星卵室 and reinforce the alien egg chamber.
拜托 你信任我 对吗 Come on, you trust me, right?
我信任你 公爵 I... trust you, The Duke.
操 好亮 Fuck. That's so bright.
快跑 快 快跑 Go. Go now! Go!
这边 王八蛋 Hey! Over here, you piece of shit!
我在这儿 I'm over here!
公爵 你在... Duke, what are you--
公爵 Duke!
不 Noooo!
该死 我打破了我的巴布·弗里克珍藏酒杯 Aww, dang it, I broke my Babu Frik collectible shot glass!
你做了什么 蠢货 What did you do, you dummy?
那是唯一阻止它的方法 It was the only way... to stop her.
你必须去沃格林 You have to get to Wallgreans.
没有你我做不到 I can't do this without you!
你可以的 Yes, you can.
希望这能弥补 I hope this makes up
我以前在墙国里做过的坏事 for some of the bad things I did in the Wall.
我是个糟糕的领袖 雪莉 I was a bad leader, Cherie.
再见 Goodbye.
我爱你 不过是父亲那样的爱 I love you... but like in a fatherly way,
而不是想要做爱那种 not like in a horny way.
我死后请别碰我的屌 Please don't touch my dick when I'm dead.
我不会的 我也爱你 公爵 I won't. I love you too, Duke.
你曾问过我的真名 You asked me once about my real name.
我的真名是 林戈 My real name is... Ringo.
沃格林
我觉得小矮人很棒 * Oh, I think scrubs are great *
别跟我说我的羊水破了 Please tell me my water didn't just break.
操 操 Fuck, fuck--
小矮人的敏捷有待商榷 * ...flyness of a scrub is up for debate *
取决于被提及的小矮人 * Depending on the scrub in question *
另一首歌是错的 * That other song has it wrong *
呐喊 * Holler! *
没错 小矮人 小矮人 小矮人 * Yes! Scrub scrub scrub *
你不差 * You ain't bad! *
别现在啊 No, not now!
冰皮礼士糖 棒 Ice cold Pez, score!
我刚意识到皮礼士糖味道像粉笔 I just realized Pez tastes like chalk.
没错 小矮人 小矮人 小矮人 * Yes, yes, scrubby scrub, scrub scrub, scrub, scrub *
小矮人 你被错看了 * Scrub, you've been misjudged *
你被忽略了 * You've been marginalized *
没事 It's okay.
没事了 It's okay.
我们终于到了 亲爱的 We finally made it, sweetie.
真希望林戈也在 I just wish Ringo was here with us.
不 No!
不不不 No! No! No!
沃格林 为你呈现一个基列国圣诞节 使女的节日故事
这一切 All of this,
公爵的牺牲 旅途 The Duke's sacrifice, the journey,
都是徒劳 it's all been for nothing.
没有沃格林 也无处可去 There's no Wallgreans and nowhere else to go.
我不喜欢 我知道我们会在那找到什么 I don't like it, and I don't know what we'll find there,
但我们必须去找你父亲 but we have to go back to your father.
我们必须回墙国 We have to go back to the Wall.
沃格林 为你呈现基列国 使女独立日盛典
到了 There it is.
没有什么是轻松的 对吗 Nothing's ever easy, is it?
操你妈 鸟 Fuck you, bird.
谢谢你 陌生生物 Thank you, strange creature.
我喜欢闪电麦昆 I like Lightning McQueen.
好的 Okay.
我不知道我们会发现什么 I don't know what we're going to find there,
但蒂姆接管已经过去一年多了 but it's been over a year since Tim took over
他又是个疯子 and he's a psycho,
所以我只能假设情况很糟 so I can only assume it's going to be bad.
没说 所以别出声 That's right. So keep quiet.
雪莉日 什么鬼 Cherie Day. What the fuck?
我不明白 一切看上去都很干净 I don't understand. Everything looks so clean,
人们看着也很开心 and the people look... happy.
全体公民注意 Attention, citizens,
请欢迎我们的领袖 蒂姆 please welcome our leader... Tim!
墙国人们 欢迎大家来到第一届雪莉日 Wallians, welcome to the first annual Cherie Day.
在我们纪念我们陨落的英雄之前 Before we get to celebrating our fallen hero,
我有一件重要的事情要宣布 there is an important announcement to make.
但是 不是由我来宣布 But you won't be hearing it from me.
我们抓到了杀人犯 We captured the murderer.
那就是 It was...
一只跑到墙国内的蟋蟀 a rogue cricket who got in the Wall.
我见过那表情 I've seen that look before.
我只想一个人待着 I'd rather just be alone, so--
雪 雪莉 Ch... Cherie?
看样子现在人人都认识我了 Seems like everyone knows me now.
你还活着 You're alive.
你怎么会还活着 肤色也深了 How are you alive and tan?
别担心 我回头再跟你解释 Don't worry about that, I'll explain later.
我来是因为我想拯救墙国 I'm here because I want to save the Wall,
-我需要你的帮助 -有什么需要拯救的 - and I need your help. - Save it from what?
我之前在人群中 我看到了你的眼神 I was in the crowd. I saw that look in your eyes.
蟋蟀 是一只蟋蟀 The cricket. It was a cricket--
别说了 你知道那是逢场作戏 Stop. You know it's all an act,
蒂姆靠撒谎 掩藏他的暴力来保护墙国 that Tim lies and hides his violence to protect the Wall.
好吧 我是见过 Okay, yeah, I've seen it.
他就跟公爵一样 He's just like the Duke.
他跟公爵不一样 他更坏 He's not like the Duke. He's worse.
但这能维护墙国的安全 But it keeps the Wall safe.
你得想想未来 You have to think about the future.
我知道 我看过未来了 I know. I've seen the future.
蒂姆不能掌权 And it's one where Tim can't be in control.
你有小孩了 You have a baby?
她叫皮斯莉 Her name is Pezlie.
-皮斯莉 -嗯 - Pezlie? - Yeah.
她在一个皮礼士糖盒子里出生 She was born in a Pez dispenser.
只有我们两个人 We're just two people.
我们没法对抗蒂姆 We can't take Tim on.
人人都爱戴他 他很强大 Everyone loves him. He's so powerful.
当我们齐心协力时 没有什么负可能 Nothing is im-possum-able when we work together.
什么 What?